Tag Archives: people

We Are All Deserving

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A woman expressed her anger at people who voted for Trump.  I responded, “People are struggling and they want someone to get them out of their struggles.” She very angrily said, “well, they should work hard.  You can’t just want something.  You have to go to school and do well in school.  You have to do what you’re supposed to do.  We have all worked very hard and that’s how we got to where we are.”

This woman has a well-off father who provided her with a head start in life.  She’s married to a professional who earns an upper middle-class income.  She comes from a background and a family of means.  Everyone thinks they’re working hard wherever they are and that they deserve whatever they have.  If other people would work just as hard, they would be successful like them; but, those others simply like to complain.

My simplistic viewpoint is as follows: Some people are born at the top of the mountain and yes, maybe they are working hard to stay there.  Other people are born in the middle of the mountain. They are trying to get to the top and yes, that is hard work.  Some people are at the bottom of the mountain, but at least they can see the mountain and see others trekking up and down the mountain.  Maybe they share tips and suggestions with others who are climbing or who have come down and are going back up.  They all know the mountain; therefore, everyone shares tidbits, suggestions, networks, referrals, and so on.  Who you know counts for a lot.

Then there are people who are born in a pit with very steep sides.  They exist at the bottom of the pit, or halfway up the pit.  Maybe they got to the top of the pit, but they’re exhausted and are just trying to stay at the top and not slip back down.  People in the pit are probably working much harder than the people at the bottom of the mountain because at the bottom of the mountain they’re not slipping back.  They’re on flat land.  People in the pit go up a little, but the sides are steep.  If they lose their grip, or they get tired, injured, or somehow lose their resources, they slide back down.  It becomes a cycle.  They slide down, then struggle to get back up.

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Neighbors and Trash

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Knowing what to do and putting it into practice are two very distinct concepts.  For me, implementation remains a continuous and, sometimes, frustrating process.

Case in point:  I continue to grow through my neighbors.  In this post, we won’t even get into the loud music, the roaring cars making screeching circles (“donuts”) in the street, the drugs, abandoned and stripped cars, etc.  Today we will deal with trash only.  I have tried to speak to my neighbors and their guests nicely and explain why I don’t like them to throw trash in front of my house.

I’ve told them: “You’re not doing this only to me.  You’re not respecting yourselves.  This is your neighborhood, your community.  Is this how you want to live?”  It’s like my outer calm infuriates them.  They curse and discard more trash, most likely mirroring my inner turmoil.

I started sweeping the trash in my yard out into the street because I’m so tired of daily picking up other people’s liquor bottles, condoms, cigarette butts, fast food boxes, and other rubbish.  It would take me less than 5 minutes to pick up the trash and then it would be gone.  But the way I do it, it lasts infinitely.  Because I sweep it out into the street, I still see it every day in front of my house.  When it rains, it becomes soggy and glued to the asphalt.  Other people see the trash.  I guess they feel that it’s a dump, so they also throw their debris there.  I then have more trash.  Wet gooey trash.  The situation worsens.

So I started thinking: “what is going on? Why must I live like this?”

My first mind, the part that gets irritated, says: “These people are wrong!  I have a right to be angry and respond accordingly!  Why can’t I have decent and considerate neighbors?  Why do I have to live in a crappy neighborhood?”

The observing and objective part of my mind says: “And??  Pick up the trash and move on instead of letting it linger.  Every time you see the trash you get angrier and angrier.  There are other things to get angry about.  This is not one of them.  Stop thinking about what bothers you.  Think about what you want and how you would like things to be.”

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