In June 2012, I wrote a list of intentions. Two of them are: “I communicate love, reason, and freedom” and “I express myself so that everyone can feel the One Love that exists in each and all of us throughout the Universe.”
I can’t say that I have consistently implemented these intentions. To be honest, when I wrote them, I expected them to happen to me as a result of my stating them. At first, I would state them aloud every day, then once a week, now once a month. Only within the last few months have I thought about really putting them into daily practice. The realization that I have to do and be something has taken quite a long time to develop.
I have always had an intellectual understanding of right behavior, but implementation has been lacking. It is much easier to “speak my word,” judge the actions and speech of other people, and bemoan the sorry state of my life and the world than to actually change my conduct. Nevertheless, I continue to read and listen, meditate and affirm. Finally – bit by bit – I am beginning to rephrase my negative expressions and reactions that occur so habitually that I have not yet been able to prevent them. Awareness is a huge first step.
I now acknowledge that I need to breathe, engage right thinking, and express corrected behavior. Many times, the best that I can do is walk away from the person and situation. I manage on most occasions to say “ok” and “thank you” with a forced half smile before my departure. Change is a process.