Yesterday, I was thinking about Job, the Biblical character. It is often stated that Job praised and thanked God throughout his afflictions; but, he didn’t. He complained extensively. He was angry. He wanted God to appear before him and tell him face to face why he was made to suffer when he had been so faithful, good, and righteous. One of Job’s friends said that his words showed that he had turned his spirit against God.
In the end, however, Job recognized that God’s ways are mysterious and that “when he hath tested me, I shall come forth as gold.” One commentary to the Book of Job states: “Job’s experiences opened his eyes more fully to the ineffable holiness of God, leading him thereby to self-knowledge and self-judgment. The sufferings of Job are shown to be corrective rather than penal, being used [by] God to test and refine his character.” Commentary in the New Scofield Reference Edition of the Holy Bible, pp. 587, 600.
Perhaps a lesson of Job is to learn to acknowledge God in all things and to grow in awareness that all is of God, regardless of our perceptions of good and bad. The enduring nature of God creates and destroys beyond our understanding or control. The best that we can do is to raise our awareness and consciousness and live the best that we can according to the virtues and principles that we know. We can strive for correct understanding that leads to correct behavior.
As I walked through a very beautiful park surrounded by nature, I began to feel a oneness with Spirit as It Is, not as my usual desire to know God so that my life will improve. For that period of time, I simply existed in my beingness with no strivings. Briefly, I had no doubt or uncertainty. I felt an inner contentment, fulfillment, and happiness.
However and whenever we are able to align ourselves with Infinite Source, our lives run more smoothly. The Universe responds to the chaos or harmony of our thoughts and behavior. We are playing its keys and creating our own music. Perhaps Job’s prior sustained prosperity caused him to stop growing in consciousness. Maybe he was merely going through rituals of praise and worship. When we lose or disregard our awareness, our connection to the Source, we experience corrective adjustments pushing us back to Ourselves.
In my meditation this morning, I thought about my goal of becoming a writer. I realized that my true goal is to know myself, to continue to open my mind to Spirit, and to become aware of my Essence, the reality of my being. My writing is an expression of that goal. This realization repeatedly emerges when I am being still and reflective. My logical mind always questions how I will sustain and support myself. An answer comes that, when I align with my purpose and deepest desire – not what I think I’m supposed to do – then what I need will manifest.
Sometimes I feel that pursuing this route is foolish, particularly when I see so many successful people who are doing, not what they love, but what they need to do to earn income, as I used to. I miss those days of financial abundance. My logical mind continuously tells me that I am not being practical. But what is the point of believing something if you’re not going to try to prove its merit? If I continue to do what I have always done, I will get the same results. My past has been money and stress OR less stress and little money. I want to experience abundance AND happiness at the same time (and not just the temporary joy that comes from things that money can buy).
During my meditation, I saw obstacles being cleared within and surrounding me. It was as though a field emanated from me and expanded like an aura. I thought, “God is preparing a path before me.” I have visualized this before and not experienced expected manifestations. Why do I keep having these awarenesses?
Long ago, I wrote an essay about everything coming together at the right time: the timing of the Universe, the stars and planets in the right place, my consciousness at an optimum point. Everything that is supportive of what is to be occurs at the same time. Then, “it” happens. The vertex creates an opening.
This is why I continue to meditate, to grow in understanding and right discernment, to study and practice. I want to position myself for the alignment and be ready to receive whatever comes through that opening. I don’t want to miss my opportunity.